Successful at what?

How do you define success?

Usually when people talk about being successful they mean wealthy - or, getting there. This creates such an absolute dynamic. Either you are rich or a failure. Achieving a goal requires that we spend time and effort with that goal in the forefront of our thinking and behaviour, which if we want to be rich, means we have to think about money a lot. I think that's fine. Go for it. BUT there are so many other ways of being successful that are less visible. And money doesn't buy love or happiness. Workaholism is a culturally condoned addiction seen as a virtue.

In order to be happy [content, pleased] it is necessary to decide what will bring you to that condition. Define what successful means for you.  If it's money, great, but actually decide. Be deliberate. Be specific. Be concrete. Don't be caught in the failure mindset by default. Then pursue that goal. 

In order to know you've achieved  a goal it must be quantifiable. Set mini goals along the path. For example, if you want to run a marathon a mini goal would be to run a 5km race after 6 weeks of training. Attaining that goal will let you know you are successfully working towards the goal of running a marathon.

Goals should be SMART

Specific

Measurable

Achievable

Realistic

Timely [how long will it take to achieve - and be realistic here too]

Regularly remind yourself that you are successfully achieving your mini-goals.

So when people talk about being successful, and you start feeling like a failure, just keep in mind the question; successful at what?